Our lives have been taken over by a small bundle of fur, wrapped around a will of iron, and a certainty that the Universe revolves around said bundle of fur and ferocity.

Just as you are nodding off to sleep, you are attacked. Just as you make your way down the stairs, you are attacked. Just as you are about to take a mouthful of hot soup… Yes you got it.. you are attacked!

But worst of all, the attack lasts milliseconds and then the damned cat dances off backwards as if terrified by your response. So you are left not only feeling attacked, but also guilty for having expressed surprise and thus startling the kitten!

Indie, the little demon goes by that shortened name; is determined to have us understand that as the newest addition to the house she has full rights to absolutely everything she wants. Fortunately Tom, the older and more established cat, is about the most laid back creature on this planet and so there have not been too many spats between the pair of them.

From time to time he has been known to growl quietly and Indie is smart enough to know that she has perhaps pushed him a bit too far. That’s when she disappears to terrorise a small furry cat toy or investigate just how far up the curtains she can climb before being discovered and shouted at!

Amongst all the myriad new cat toys perhaps the most exciting have been (in no particular order) the box in which her scratching post came; the label still attached to her new cat Igloo; and the tassels on the curtain tie backs.

Yes. You have spotted it. None of the cat toys come even close to plain ordinary household stuff! If you find yourself with a new kitten save yourself a small fortune by simply looking out old cardboard boxes – these make the perfect den; pieces of string (currently voted the best cat toy ever in Kits R Us); and find a sleepy relative to come and be pounced on as they nod off.

With the money that you save on cat and kitten toys you will be able to put down a deposit with the re-upholstery firm who you will be using once you have broken the kitten of its habit of destroying furniture.

That’s it for now. I have a kitten to entertain!