Hi there guys. I have just had an update on life in Nottingham and thought that you might like to make some notes for what you have to do to get your grandparents to bring you all the goodies you can imagine – and a few more too!

But first of all let’s go through the grandchild list shall we? These are the things to remember if you really want to get the most out of the grandparents. Don’t worry about being found out, that just won’t happen. They have absolutely NO idea what we are capable of. And if by some weird freak of chance they do start thinking that they are being taken for a ride all you have to do is fall back on basic trick No 1 – SMILE and gurgle! That always works, and they wonder what on earth they had been thinking about.

Anyway, back to the Nottingham scene. As you know GranJan is my biggest ally and also supplier of great toys. She knows exactly what I am looking for – basically bright shiny things that make a noise. Things I can throw around and also stuff into my mouth without choking, when I am planning my next moves on my dad.

Now, you may recall that she is coming over for my birthday and so I know that there will be lots and lots of goodies to fill the apartment with and get under mum and dad’s feet. I think it is pretty hilarious when dad stands on something in his bare feet and then hops around using some quite strong language. He doesn’t seem to have any sense of humour when this happens, but I tell you it makes me howl with laughter!

The bad news is that GranJan has been informed that she can’t bring her usual ten or twelve cases stuffed with presents and shoes. Apparently they are travelling with just hand luggage, which limits things quite dramatically. Now I don’t mind about the shoes, but the lack of goodies for me is a tad concerning. That was why I used the last Facetime with her to suggest subliminally that she could always pack some things in FarFar’s case.

He is always going on about not needing loads of things when he comes to visit, so I just let her think about spreading her and my things between the two cases. I am not sure quite how this is working yet, but I have a couple of more Facetime sessions before they come over and I will make sure that the important people get looked after properly.

I am pretty sure that things are starting to happen because my spies over in England have commented on one or two heated exchanges about the stupidity of just having hand luggage.

My Grandad keeps bleating on about the fact that they are only visiting for a couple of days, but he seems to have forgotten the need to bring loads and loads of presents. After all I am the best grandchild in the world and so should be treated accordingly.

GranJan mutters darkly about how little he cares for the important people in his life and that one day he will regret this selfish attitude. On one occasion apparently he rolled his eyes and remarked that he was already being punished, but this was said extremely quietly! He clearly knows the need for self-preservation.

I have cunningly managed to plant the idea of a spotted red handkerchief to hold all Farfar’s things. This would leave me and GranJan with two cases for presents and some shoes, if she really has to have them. The next stage is to convey the idea that the streets of Stockholm are paved with gold and everything should work out well. Supposedly this scheme worked very well for a guy called Dick Whittington.

Apparently the alternative was to have a cat wearing thigh length boots, but I will admit that my source of ideas – ‘The Book of Nursery Rhymes’ is not necessarily the best thought out of schemes. I will have to let you know how everything goes.


Look out for my next post – it will tell you how they managed the trip. I think there could be fun along the way!